Truth is funnier than most things you can make up. Margo Kaufman More Quotes by Margo Kaufman More Quotes From Margo Kaufman Besides, the only thing you can control in life is your wardrobe. Cars break down when you least expect it. Boats eat money and gas. Your house, your mate, your friends, your family, even your career, are beyond your control. However, you're in total command of what you put on your back each morning. Margo Kaufman careers house morning One person's mess is merely another person's filing system. Margo Kaufman filing mess organized It seems to be a rule of life that the less qualified you are to give counsel, the more counsel you give. Margo Kaufman rules-of-life qualified giving We are living in the era of the busybody. In ancient Greece, if a person wanted guidance, it involved a long, arduous expensive journey to consult the oracle at Delphi. Today, if you want guidance, all you have to do is unplug your ears. Margo Kaufman journey advice long Show dogs and their handlers remind me of Brooke Shields and her mother: an incredibly disheveled person tethered to an impeccably groomed animal. Margo Kaufman dog mother animal I once complained to my father that I didn't seem to be able to do things the same way other people did. Dad's advice? 'Margo, don't be a sheep.People hate sheep. They eat sheep.' Margo Kaufman dad hate father My husband says that I'm afraid of heights, but that's not true. What I'm afraid of is falling. Margo Kaufman height husband fall ... trying to control construction costs is like trying to control the cost of a hospital stay. You may not realize that when you sneeze and the nurse hands you a box of tissues, it generates a $5 charge on your bill. But you still have to pay. Margo Kaufman nurse trying hands I asked my vet what kind of dog he'd get. He told me, 'I'd get a Chihuahua, because when it died, I wouldn't care. Margo Kaufman vets care dog Remodeling is like pulling a loose thread on a cheap sweater - the job keeps unraveling. Margo Kaufman unraveling sweaters jobs Remarriage is an excellent test of just how amicable your divorce was. Margo Kaufman divorce excellent tests I have never enjoyed an experience that begins at five A.M. Margo Kaufman enjoyed five ... no effort based on love is wasted. Margo Kaufman effort love-is Remodeling defies the principles of modern commerce. You shell out great sums of money to people over whom you have no authority or power, yet these same people are constantly insinuating that you're cheap. (It reminded me of medicine, another area where you shell out great sums of money to people over whom you have no authority or power, who make you feel guilty for questioning a bill.) Construction workers are the blue-collar version of the snooty salespeople at Gucci who make $8 an hour but look down on you if you balk at a $400 alligator wallet. Margo Kaufman construction-workers medicine blue ... blueprints are like pets and children -- difficult to appreciate or understand unless they're yours. Margo Kaufman appreciate pet children The pug is living proof that God has a sense of humor. Margo Kaufman pugs dog funny I think bad taste should be a felony. Margo Kaufman hatred taste thinking A book collection is a cross between a Rorschach test and This Is Y our Life. It marks your life clearly like rings on a tree. Margo Kaufman rorschach tree book House guests (I don't care who they are, how much I like them, or how long it's been since I last saw them) are pests, much like roaches and mice. But there are differences. You can trap roaches and mice. And they don't want you to drive them to Disneyland. Margo Kaufman differences house long At the beginning of a remodel, money is everything, but as you go along, it becomes secondary to the vision. You can't have the house looking like a glorious jewel and leave the cracked linoleum or the icky light fixture, so you spend and spend and spend. Then one day it suddenly occurs to you that all that play money you've been throwing around is real - and it's in someone else's bank account. Margo Kaufman light real jewels
