Richard Turner Professions : Magician Born : June 16, 1954 Browse All Authors Top 8 quotes by Richard Turner I'm a woofer, not a tweeter; a writer, not a telegrapher; an essayist, not an aphorist. Richard Turner essayists internet I am at a loss to figure out how to rid my e-mail of those bottom-feeders of the electronic world, the generators of spam.... If I were Emperor of the World, I would lock all the spammers in a room and force them to watch nothing but TV commercials for the rest of their miserable lives, and I would condemn the people who respond to spammers to do nothing but clean the toilets in this room. Richard Turner mail loss people Anytime I see someone blocking the aisle in the supermarket while talking on a phone, I want to ram that person with my shopping cart. Richard Turner block phones talking Mudslinging - In politics, anything bad the opponent says about our candidate; in contrast, when our candidate does this, it is called 'making a good point. Richard Turner opponents political doe Warranty A notice telling the buyer when the product that was just purchased will no longer function. Richard Turner buyers function products Self-Checkout Line The place where customers of an establishment become unpaid employees of the establishment. Richard Turner lines establishment self Speed Limit – A sign that tells you at what speed the car that's rapidly fading from view in your rearview mirror is going; a law that provides the sole means of support for many small-town police departments. Richard Turner mirrors views mean Grammar Checker – A software program that is not needed by those who know grammar and virtually useless for those who don’t. Richard Turner grammar program useless Similar Authors Andrew Mayne magician Al Koran magician David Berglas magician David Copperfield magician Doug Henning magician David Devant magician All Authors