Quotes by Hillarious Elizabeth Taylor's so fat she puts mayonnaise on aspirin. Joan Rivers hillarious mayonnaise aspirin I was just reading about the new Lindsay Lohan diet, which is all liquid. 80 proof. Joan Rivers hillarious liquid reading I'm in nobody's circle, I've always been an outsider. Joan Rivers hillarious outsiders circles She's so hairy - when she lifted up her arm I thought it was Tina Turner in her armpit. Joan Rivers hillarious armpits arms I like colonic irrigation because sometimes you find old jewelry. Joan Rivers hillarious jewelry sometimes She's so fat, she's my two best friends. Joan Rivers hillarious two-best-friends two She's so pure, Moses couldn't even part her knees. Joan Rivers hillarious knees sarcastic